Still Grateful

Here’s a story for those who love such things:

I was once a man (seems like so long ago) who didn’t have much,
But I knew how to love, and loved all I had.
One day I got something I grew to adore and prize
Above all else I had, and I desired not much more.
But not long after, I began to lose the little that I had.
After each loss, I would say to myself and to Him on my knees,
‘I’ve lost something quite dear, but I’m still grateful.’

Then I would pray and hope that I wouldn’t lose this one thing.
Till the day came when I lost this one thing, and I broke…
That day I heard the cries that seemed to be stuck
Someplace so deep they couldn’t find their way out;
I felt screams that I couldn’t hear – too many;
They tore up my body as they escaped to who knows where.
If I had any sense left I would have known
That those were heart-cries and soul-screams…
It took me a while and a miracle to get on my knees and say,
‘I’ve lost what I value most, but I’m still grateful.’

I’ve got nothing to lose
I’ve lost everything worth keeping
All I have is the one thing I wouldn’t mind losing now – life;
I still breathe, though each breath brings such pain
My eyes have lost their light and my heart its way
I can’t tell the difference between hot and cold anymore
I have no idea if I’m freezing or burning up
My mind has become a ‘Merry-go-round’
Going round and round and round about
The same tragic events – the losses and disappointments
All the steps that led, apparently inevitably, to this place;
Where up is down, and sideways is the new forward;
It’s a labyrinth that stretches from dawn to dawn,
Always as bright as a moonless cloudy night.
And the sounds, so many unintelligible sounds;
I’m sure they might mean something quite important
But I can’t tell a hoot from a toot – all moot.
I have to say, it’s a surprise I can still talk…

Even though now I feel like a faded shadow of the man I once was,
I say to myself and to Him in the loudest whisper I can muster,
‘I didn’t know there was more I could lose, but still I’m grateful.’
I can do this because there’s something I haven’t told you yet…
I’m still grateful because my life isn’t my own – not mine to lose;
My story isn’t for my benefit; I’m a unique story – true,
But one of over eight billion other stories being told simultaneously;
And if He chooses to make my story the most miserable one,
Then I can be grateful for you all, my dear friends;
That I can share my story, and none will have any excuse not to be grateful.


5 thoughts on “Still Grateful

  1. ‘I’ve lost what I value most, but I’m still grateful’ what a vulnerable but yet powerful statement.
    To maintain an attitude of gratitude in the midst of a loss is a different level of strength. But greater strength is found when we cry out to Him who died so that we may live.

    Liked by 1 person

    • True true, Cyn. This one was a bit difficult to write, and was inspired in part by a touching true story I stumbled upon. It’s always great getting feedback from you. Do stay blessed, and safe.

      Liked by 1 person

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